Plan a Third Side Conversation

ThirdSiders are continually asking the question, “What is ready to emerge from this conflict?” As Thirdsiders our role is not necessarily to have answers to specific conflicts, but to help all involved work through their own situations and to act as a container for creative contention. If you are a party to a conflict or part of the surrounding community and want to initiate or invite a dialogue you might think about holding a Thirdside Conversation. Below is a format for doing so as well as some tools to help you get started and think through the process.

Plan a 3S ConversationIf you are planning on having a difficult conversation, you can use the form below to help you. This is a simple way to start a Third Side conversation within any conflict, allowing all of us to listen for what wants to arise.

These questions can help you:

  • review the conflict you are trying to support
  • get some perspective about the greater whole
  • recognize your own biases and assumptions

Doing this will also support your ability to make your own Third Side questions.

Alternatively, you can print these questions and fill them out by hand – download them here.


Your Name *

Your e-mail *

This conversation is concerning:


Balcony Perspective

Emotional Balcony

How will I manage my emotions? The questions I might ask myself are:

How will I defuse their emotions? The questions I might ask the others are:

Rational Balcony

What are my interests?

What are the other party's interests?

What are the interests of the surrounding community?

Creative Balcony

What are the options for mutual gain for all parties, including the surrounding community?

How will I encourage others to think creatively?


Third Side Roles

What Third Side roles need to be played in this situation?

What third side roles will I play? What specific actions will I take in those roles?

Who else can play one of the third side roles needed in this conflict?


Next Steps

How will I introduce the topic? How will I get started?

What will I listen for?

What questions will I ask?